Monday, June 12, 2006

Rabid Riddlers

There is a conspiracy going on here. And I don't like it. Let me explain the turn of events to see if you agree.

1.Every night, I take my pill before bed. Last week I go to take one as usual and notice that I am near the end of my packet. I look in my drawer where I keep the six month supply, and discover that it must be six months since I got them as they are gone. In the morning I wake up extra early to call the doctors, who arrange a repeat prescription.

2. The same morning, I get to the bathroom, realise I feel a bit off, have explosive diarrhea, and have to stretch over and grab the mop bucket to be sick at the same time. That lasts for 2 days. I later discovered it was a bug that lots of the cast at the show got as well.

3. Once the bug had subsided, I pick up my prescription, and head off to the chemist. I wait for ages whilst the pharmacists talk amongst themselves, stroke chins, and look through charts and books. Then they tell me that the pill I have been on for the last 2 years, Microval, has been taken off the market, and that I will have to go back to the Doctors to get a different prescription. I go right away, and see the doctor who recommends Noriday. (I love the name, No ri Day or remora). The Doctor reminds me that as I am on a new pill, I am unprotected for 7 days.

4.Three days into the new pill, and I get toothache. The kind of toothache that hurts with hot and cold things. Which in my experience, means an abscess. Which means antibiotics. (I haven't actually been to the dentist yet. Real fear and lack of money is putting me off. So if any one can recommend a nice and painless one in edinburgh please do!)

Do you see where I am going here?

Well I tell you, o big finger waving being from above with superior power and a GSOH, you are not catching me out. You hear?
Yes, it is true that I am probably the healthiest I have been in a long time.
And its summer, and summer = randy-ness, and you have tried to get me on every angle,

But I really don't want a riddler.


Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder...


At 11:26 AM, Blogger Dr Geist said...


im sure your baby will be neither riddled esq or rabid

hopefully it will also be a lot cleaner than the riddler in the pic, tho if u keep your child down a well then it might get a bit manky. but im pretty sure social services would have stepped in well before then! (keeping your child in a well would be doubly cruel if it was rabid as surely it would also suffer from hydrophobia??)

At 9:17 PM, Anonymous Dundee said...

It's maybe not a bad thing. You're an old burd now and that biological clock won't tick forever! ;o)

At 12:00 AM, Blogger sarah said...

dundee you're such a charmer.
Happy Bday Dr Geist!
But you are wrong. Me + Alan = Riddler. And it will most likely be ginger.

At 7:55 PM, Blogger Jodi said...

NOOOOOoooooo! Not a Ginger, please not a ginger! Babysitters would be hard to find. ;op

At 10:15 PM, Blogger Emma said...

Well we sorted that one out today Sarah HA HA!!
To fill you in: Sarah got chucked into the back of my car on a quest for ROBBIE tickets, between one very lovable if-just-a-little-snottery/rude three year old and darling Breagha (11 months) who's only trait is she HATES cars..WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
My appointment with the fanny mechanics is three months overdue - who needs contraception when you've got exposure to the end product. (move over Pete... a wee bit more? thanks.)


Post a Comment

<< Home