Sunday, November 19, 2006

Laughing Gas

I was at my works official Christmas Party last night. I didn't want to go. I'm not good at these things. What I didn't realise till I got inside is that this is the high point in most peoples social calendar, and that a lot of effort had gone into each and every outfit. It was obvious that the women had been to the hairdressers to get strange things done to their hair, and spent a fortune on their dress. Unfortunately they all looked like shit.

The entertainment came in the form of "C.J. the D.J." and a cover band. I felt the need to make my own entertainment if I was going to last till 1am so I pulled the helium balloons off our table, pierced a hole in them, inhaled as much as I could and sang along to "daydream believer" . Then I had the whole table doing it, then we stole balloons from other tables. That continued for 3 or 4 numbers. It only has a comedy value of about 1 and a half numbers.

In true buffet style, the food looked nice but wasn't. I found myself breaking up bits of quiche and throwing them at people round the table and looking the other way. I was throwing bits of pakora, aiming for Kats cleavage when C.J. the D.J. announced that the buses were waiting outside to take us to town. The bus was full of arseholes singing hibees anthems. The bus driver was pretty unamused at this and kept pulling over until they shut up, only for them to start again singing "the driver of the bus is a jambo".
So a great time was had by all. Can hardly wait till the next one.


At 1:02 PM, Blogger Gordon said...

Ohh that sounds WONDERFUL!


thankfully our work night outs are largely based around tequila, and hence, end up being fairly hilariously riotous.. I think..

At 11:08 PM, Blogger sarah said...

Yeah tequilla is good. It makes me dance. Which isn't so good for spectators. Unofficial work nights out are good. It just seems to be teh company ones that don't do it for me.

At 9:41 PM, Blogger margin walker said...

Id love to avoid these situations but fear of being classed as a social retard makes me unable to avoid them..

At 1:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'll see you on Monday Sarah. We need to talk.

Jim Needham

At 3:29 PM, Blogger sarah said...

Yes Jim, we do.

At 10:23 AM, Anonymous dose of reality said...

nothing wrong with singing hibees anthems, at least we don't sing about killing catholics and blowing up brits, like those wonderful weegies.

At 6:27 PM, Blogger sarah said...

I hate these fuckers who leave cutting comments but dont actually show themselves!
And such a sweeping statement too. The same as me saying all burgers are junkies.
I had no intention of upsetting hibs fans, or hearts fans. That shit means nowt to me. Nor do i tend to socialise with weegies who sing about killing people. Or burgers who are junkies.

At 4:09 AM, Anonymous jane said...

hello just found your blog when searching for a good Edinburgh one - loving yours by the way : )

you should also have a look at Blogzira - a funny blog you might like. keep up the blog - you're hilarious :)


At 7:50 PM, Blogger Little Nut Tree said...

god this was funny. I hope you still pop back to look at this sometimes... I'd love to know where you were writing now... I've chuckled quite a bit in the last 15 minutes...

One thing I really wanna know.... who was Jim Needham and why did you need to talk on Monday???? So intriguing!!!


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