Sunday, March 26, 2006

Magenta Fairy Cakes

So, 16th of March was my 30th birthday. I knew something was happening, but I just didn't quite know what. Alan and me made our way through to weegie land, and he treated me to a trolley dash in Primark.

Oh Primark how I love thee so,
Distance makes my longing grow.
Please get here soon I need you near,
So I can purchase great cheap gear.

Sorry, where was I?
We got booked in to the hotel, a birthday treat from my Dad and Kim, I ran a bath and awaited further instructions.

Got a call to meet in Strata at 7.30pm, so I got there and no one was there. Ordered a pint, drank the pint, got bored. I asked Alan what was happening, he just laughed, so I looked out the window. A lot. Got a bit stroppy. Had another pint. Texted Lorraine, no reply. Frustrated now, I picked out a a cocktail from the menu. Shakers and crushed ice were flung around behind the bar, it arrived, and it was fantastic. I was on my third sip when Alan's mobile went.

"Right we need to go now" he said.
"Ehm this cocktail was £6, I'll go in a minute!" was my reply.
I decide to tank it anyway, as by now my need to know what was happening was greater.

I get walked towards the polo lounge. A very nice but very gay club. Then I work out I'm being led to the old 13th note, now called Bachus. Thank Christ! I think. We get inside, and there is no one there again. Dirty Paul appears. Knicker Swapper appears, asking me to come downstairs. Get to the bottom and there is a poster on the door, as pictured here. Behind that door was pretty much everyone.
It was a surprise and I was overwhelmed. Too many faces to take in at once. Then my mum appeared. That was a really big surprise as she lives in Devon, and I really had no idea. Then both my brothers. Another big deal as I never get to see them together. Then people take turns to greet me with lovely cards and pressies and daft hats. Then my Dad and Kim arrive with Rochelle and Ryan, having lied on the phone about their whereabouts an hour earlier to me, and the whole time I'm thinking, Jodi did all this. How nice is that? I had a cheesy D.J. and a buffet and everything. The buffet even had magenta fairy cakes. AND she never once let anything slip beforehand.

Then I got a really great present form Jodi. She had looked up my wishlist on myspace, and presented me with pictures of everything I wish for, ranging from a llama to a villa inTuscany. I also got a letter from Robbie reminding me of my date in September.

Then it was time to get pissed and dance a lot and have a laugh. Which we pretty much all did.

Dawn made Simona laugh alot, Russell fell for Dawn, David pimped about, Furnish growled at Ted, Ted remained aloof, Kelly felt my arse, Cain wore a suit, Rochelle crashed fags, Steven danced with Jim, Jim danced with Gary, The buffet got scoffed, The bar took £600+, The DJ played Peter Andre, my balloons all got burst, Bye byes were made, taxis were hailed, to Jodi's.

We then drank some more till 5am, including Buckfast. It was in my 100 things to do before you are 30 list anyway. We then got a taxi back to the hotel. I lay down and fell asleep instantly, and woke up to Alan saying, "that's ten to 10, we' ll miss breakfast!". We didn't. We ate, we checked out and got the train to his mum and dads.

Cue the worst hangover I have ever had. But it was worth it. Thank you to all who came for a lovely night, and fab cards and presents. I will always remember turning 30, but now ill remember it more fondly. Jodi you did me proud girl, and ill get you in 2009. Mwahh. Burlesque indeed.

Monday, March 06, 2006

The Lost Art of Keeping Secrets

It's my Birthday soon.
Actually it's my 30th birthday soon.
And something is going down. Lots of "get out the room a minute?" and "what thing where? I don't know what you mean?" comments.
I've tried fishing for hints. I don't get anywhere. My friends are remaining tight lipped. Alan mentioned the disappointment of Ronald being fully booked, and therefore unable to make an appearance, but that's about it. This is all mainly Jodi's doing. I had no idea she could be so sneaky. I'll just have to be patient.
Thing is,

I'm not so great with patience.

I like knowing stuff.

This is killing me.

I may actually die.